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Thursday, October 23, 2008

S'not my fault!

We were already running about 5 minutes late for school/work this morning when Alpha bounded into the kitchen wearing my sweatshirt... the one she barely gave back to me two days ago. The one she borrowed a month ago and left at her friend's house. In fact, the one that had I not witnessed the friend returning and made a lucky grab, I would still be without. Oh, wait! I am still without it, because it is back on the kid.

So there we are making a dash for the door, when I remember that the sweatshirt she is wearing is the same one I wore when I rode home yesterday. On my bike. In 48 degree weather.

Have I mentioned that although I can tell you my 7th grade locker combination, 40-7-1, I cannot EVER remember to take a Kleenex with me when I ride? Have I mentioned that I have a fairly thin, worthless nose that does not hold heat well? Well, for sure I haven't mentioned that I often resort to my sleeve for... um... moisture management. I know, sick, huh?. Don't worry, I'm discreet. I make it look more like I'm dabbing sweat. Nose sweat. From inside my nose.

But back to the door. Girl in snotty sweatshirt vs. mom who is LATE and will be LATER if girl goes to change her top. I hate moral dilemmas.... dilemmi?

It turned out not to be much of a battle between the little Janes on my shoulders. The devil one said 'Fagettaboutit!'... the angel one said 'Mrph frft crsht' which I think was 'let's go get muffins!' I thought about lifting up my purse strap and asking her to repeat, but... shit! I was LATE!!!

23 comments:

MaDukes said...

So I'm assuming you let her wear it anyway. If she reads this, you are in big trouble right?

The operative word in my yesterdays blog is "was" I "was" the girly girl. I think the last time I wore a dress was a year ago in September at a wedding. Now she wears a dress practically everyday at the bank she works at. However, she hunts and fishes, and I read and shop. The lines pretty much blur now at our ages. Girly girl and Tomboy are no longer words we know.
You are wearing long sleeves today right? Or did you decide to carry a tissue?
Deb

Kat said...

I think that was a just punishment for the stealing of one's favorite sweatshirt...

TwiBitch said...

LOL. Works for me! That'll teach her to bring back your 'borrowed' things. BTW, I assume you told her about your 'tissue sweatshirt' at the evening meal, right? Absolutely want to make sure she knows about it...don't ya'? I can hear her now...."eeeewwwww!"

Shanna said...

I read this last night and was too flippin' tired to comment anything worth while. Worth while being something equally as funny as what YOU wrote. Seems though, now that I'm writing said comment, I'm just not getting any further in the funny department. So instead of continuing to write, I think I'll just stop now.

But HEY! It's Friday! ;)

Tracie said...

Well, thats what she get for taking your sweatshirt. Really shoulda, in a gross kinda way, given you a little please all day.

I think you owed to her.

Nadine Hightower said...

eeuuuuwwwaaaaaa!!!

Miss Thystle said...

As the mother of a teenager that takes an hour and fifteen minutes to PUT ON the outfit she picked out the the night before, I say, Snotty Sweatshirt is just punishment.

The Lady in Pearls said...

Since Livewriter is a Mr. Gates product, I wasn't too sure he'd let me use it to post things to non-Spaces blogs. I thought he might just twist my posts into something else. For instance, I would type in "Jane is an incredibly funny woman" but it would post as "Jane's daughter wears boogar sleeves".

So, of course, I had to test him....

Diane said...

Oh God, this made me laugh out loud! I have to admit (but don't tell anyone), I do the same thing when I run. Gross, yes... also very effective (and it saves the evironment, right?).

And it totally goes along with my 'choo' post for today! :)

jill said...

awesomeness....i'll bet she thinks twice before borrowing your clothes again.

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

Hey man, borrower beware, I say.
"Thought it was a sweatshirt but itsnot..." - - ever heard that song before? Anyone? Anyone?

MaKukes said...

Hey - too cool. I just say my udate on your must reads. How's that work? I like it. Or am I the only one who sees it?

Anyway -- just wanted to stop by while I am in the blogging mode to say hi and wish you an awesome weekend -- boogar sleeves and all!

Deb

Let's try this again.. MaDukes... said...

LMAO -- Makukes? Who typed that? I didn't....did I?

Somehow it just seems fitting though.

Noanie said...

Eh! What's a little snot between relatives - late is late!

Have a good one!

Anonymous said...

As she took something of yours without asking, I think it was perfect that she wore it all day. I do hope you told her after school about how it is a rather large tissue! g

t i m said...

59753169th commandment – Thou shall improvise when Kleenex is out of sight

Lorrie Veasey said...

OMGawd it is THE CIRCLE OF LIFE.

We start out covered in THEIR snot and vomit and then eventually they grow old enough to be covered IN OURS.

I for one, can't wait til this happens to me because right now Banana has a fear of those blower hand dryers in the public washroom and uses my legs as her own personal roll of paper towels.

Shana said...

What is a little snot between mom and daughter??

Mannyed said...

hehe, but you did tell her after the day was done - right? You know something like, oh, btw, that thing on the sleeve of my sweatshirt that you're wearing...well, that's just my moisture management. No biggie.

Debbie said...

Now, if you had been lucky enough to have a boy borrowing that shirt, he would have never known if those were his trails down the sleeve or yours. Did you ever confess?
This is a great post. Thanks for linking today.

LuckyMe said...

haha. good post. justice served.

afiori said...

LOL - great writing!

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Jannie said...

A little dried snot between family members is to be expected and will certainly only make your bond grow stronger.