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Friday, December 19, 2008

Not as daft as you all would have me

Before you all get too used to the idea that I have lost my mind - along with my hearing, let me remind you that I am not as CRAZY as I am CHEAP. Shame on any of you who thought I would hand out my debit card without some type of collateral backup. Besides that, *sigh*, most of the things they purchased were either within official guidelines or something I had flat out requested... like vacuum cleaner belts.

I know. You're thinking why the heck did I need cookies when I had Style 5 belts to come home to. For sustanance, that's why. Changing the belt on my vacuum is only slightly easier than getting teenagers to focus.

Okay, men? This is the point where you might want to just head over to the BCS website and admire my fine Utes for making it into the Sugar Bowl. Nothing to see here. Go on... run along!

Okay, the one item on the $54+ list that I did have a problem with was the $8 box of tampons. Seriously? Now I'm all in favor of this product, because when you have teenage daughters you don't want to NOT be buying them if you know what I mean from a Sarah Palin point of view. But eight dollars for 36? Plus, I had an isolated incident of clarity and recalled the same daughter tossing the same box into my cart not 3 days before. What is she doing with $16 dollars worth of (gold plated?) tampons? I believe you could actually wring her completely out and not come up with enough fluid of any type to fill up 72 tampons. And older daughter has always made due with storebrand. I'm good with generic, even. I'm sure Omega would be mortified to hand out Target Tampons to her cheer posse but, you know, moochers should not be choosers because 0nce they're installed people can't even tell what brand they are. Really.

Now I admit to being cheap but I am not chinsy. I have bought the special Playtex Sport model before because they profess to have a little extra security skirt or something... which is probably useful to someone who is regularly being tossed in the air by boy hands applied to her spanky-clad butt. So I save the coupons - usually for a whole dollar and I watch for sales because it really is the principle of the thing. Storebrand on the fly... but namebrand requires my sick shopping skilz.

I examined the box and not only noted that they had no special skirt but, I didn't see that they would clear up your zits, or get you a date or even make your parents disappear so... jeez, and I am not getting over this very quickly... eight dollars?? At Target? Did the Chinese tampon factory get a little too close to the fireworks warehouse... or I have I just been woefully neglectful of prices in the hygiene aisle?

Since I'm really not one to go stand in the return line for something like this, I need some closure... ideas? Anyone?


Cindy said...

There there is my Dear child, who believes she will die a thousand deaths if she had to buy her own hygiene products...And has the nerve to complain when I get the store brand...I shut her up by saying "I don't need them anymore, YOU do, so if I don't buy them, your the one out of luck." Basically saying take what I get you or get them yourself!
I haven't heard a complaint since.


Shana said...

That is weird because Marissa said the other day that she likes the pads in the orange wrap. They are the ones that I bought at the dollar store. 10 pads for a dollar!!
The day Marissa complains will be the day she buys them herself

Lorrie Veasey said...

My banana is only five so I can be of no help. I do hope, however, that by 2019 we will have had a woman president and eradicated the scourge that is menstruation.

Who's with me?

meg said...

Now, I realize I've been out of the loop (so to speak) for a couple years now, but $8.00 for tampons? That is way out of proportion for the amount of material used & the *ahem* life-expectancy of said product.
Second issue- if the girl is going thru that many, she needs iron pills (or a visit to the dr) more than gold-plated tampons :-P

Jane! said...

Thus my confusion... she's NOT going through them.

You're on your own Lorrie... I presume that I won't care by then, but hell no... builds character.

Laoch of Chicago said...

How about those Utes!

Gina (Mannyed) said...

Is she perhaps reselling them for a profit?

Maybe the tampon tree is in short supply driving up the cost and demand?

Nadine Hightower said...

HUH?! $8 tampons??? They make them???

Who Knew??

g said...

How about the old switcheroo? Put the generic brand in the expensive tampon box and keep the $8 ones for yourself.

Oh, and what Meg said if Omega is actually using them so quickly.

Have a great weekend, g

Debbie said...

Yes, it is time for her to meet the cold, hard reality of generic shopping. It is OK. She will make it through.

Anonymous said...

All I know is that now, not only have you destroyed my high hopes of ride-up-less panties but NOW you've crushed my dreams of the perfect tampon. I saw the commercial for those same ones the other day and I was ready to try 'em out next month. Damn.
Well, at least I can spend that extra $4 on a small latte or something LOL ;)

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

I read somewhere that the price of tampons is inversely proportional to the price of oil and since oil has dropped over $100 per barrel recently, then I don't think there's a whole lot you can do about it right now, although you might be able to sit in on the next Opec meeting if they allow conference calls.

thesleepdeprivedmomma said...

I'm choosy. I admit it. There are certain things that I adamantly will NOT go generic for. That said, I think my favorite brand (Kotex security)is $6.00 (rounded up) at WAL*HELL for 40. If my 2nd choice (Tampax PEARL) is cheaper, or I have a coupon (yup . . . cause it's My $0.75 dammit) I spring right over the corporate lines. Then again, I've bought my own since I was 13 and had a regular income from babysitting. Otherwise, my Momma woulda brought home nothing but those horrible diaper like generic pads and I wouldn't have used a *gasp* tampon (cause there was a girl that DIED from using tampons. It was on 29/20)until I was 17 and safely away at college (where, by the way, I tried many other things that were Much more dangerous to my health than tampons).

Anonymous said...

Maybe Nadine's right - maybe she's selling them for profit. What's the street value for a sport tampon these days?

My personal theory...If you're like my mother and have worked hard to convince the girl that her "business" is special and should be taken care of by not allowing little boys in there until after a proper courtship and church ceremony, then maybe she's convinced she deserves the gold-plated tampons. Special begat special, right? More than likely, though, that's the kind everybody else is using, so...

Just Plain Joy said...

I don't have any advice or thoughts on the topic of the day, but I wanted to say I read your blog every day and always get a laugh. And, I wanted to comment on your new header - I love it! Is it custom or a template? Either way, it looks great!

adlibby said...

Oh dear... you are my Christmas future. I have a nine year old and a 7 year old and I'm just coming to grips with having to talk to the older one about S-E-X. I hadn't even considered the cost of tampons!!

I'll be hanging on your every word from now on... try not to scare me! I LOVE your blog & the design is GORGEOUS! Wow!

Shupe said...

OH NO! Have they really gone UP that much in price? **picks up jaw**
I haven't bought any in years- so I had no idea.
Ya, Monkey butt being 7 I have a while to go- thank god-
I know she has no choice but to use them-
You could threaten to use the ones without the inserter thingy! GO GREEN!!!
I'm still in shock that women get screwed over- damned men!

j said...

Excuse me. Pardon me please. I've obviously stumbled into the wrong seminar but, if you would please thank PA for the most loving cheek licking I've had all day.
Carry on ladies.

Noanie said...

I'm at a loss also as to why those damn things cost so much. So I'd suggest buying stock in that company because surely they are making a ton of profit on the product!

TwiBitch said...

Oh Jane...$8 tampons? Since when? Guess it's been a while for me...thankfully! Just wondering if you've made a ToDo list for the girls so they can work off the cost of those things? OUCH!