I love these people!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Her high school chemistry teacher has just resigned

Jane is standing at the clinic desk trying to get an MRI scheduled... Merry Christmas Jane!

Twenty-Something Receptionist is studiously filling out the online form:

TSR: Do you have a pacemaker?

J: No

TSR: Any this... any that?

J: No. No.

TSR: Any chance you are pregnant?

J: *laughs* Define chance.

TSR: What?

J: No.

TSR: Do you have any metal in your head?

J: Uh, yeah.

TSR (stops typing): You do. (Not a question because I guess she gets this a lot?)

Isn't that just like Jane to make TSR's life difficult?

J: I had to have my jaw joint rebuilt a bit about 30 years ago. There's a metal thingy (medical term) in there making up part of the joint.

TSR: What's it made of?

J: Beats me. Something metalish? It shows up really well on an x-ray.

TSR (still tapping away): Well, could it possibly be titanium? Because if it is titanium, it will spark, which will not be pleasant... besides all the damage it could do to the equipment.

J (ever the comedian): It's probably not titanium. I was only about 20 when it happened. I don't think titanium had even been invented yet...

TSR (looking me over for the first time): Oh yeeahh. Duh!

And then Jane lumbered her big ole Brontasaurus body out of the office and back to the tar pits.

PS: For those of you who do realize that titanium is an element - discovered in the 1700's - rest assured that the doctor and radiologist were ultimately consulted and it was determined that Jane's head will not be sparking. This time.


jill said...

you do look awesome for someone who had surgery before titanium was invented....lol

and i'm glad your head won't spark.

and the snow was real. but today? blue sky and big white puffy clouds...aaahhhhhhh

The Lady in Pearls said...

Are TSR's just getting dumber as time goes by, or are we really so much smarter than they will ever be?

And don't be jealous, it's cold here, too - hence the dry, chapped, sandpaper elbows! But I love you for saying my butt looked like MKO's, cuz I kinda thought that too, but I didn't want to brag..... ; )

Shupe said...


busted up out loud here at work.
FYI- I rode up with the old fart today to work.
snow is snow- wasn't chancing it again.

love ya babycakes!
even if you're a metal head!

Miss Thystle said...

I love that you mess with the help. That's my favorite pass time. Especially sales girls and solictation calls.

Debbie said...

Why is that so funny and sad at the same time? I love the response of the receptionist. I often like to tell them false things just to see their heads spark.

Tracie said...


I'm actually picturing Jane's head all ablaze - like a 4th of July sparkler. (ok, sorry, not funny)

I'm sure the TSR was not dumb just extra curious, like a 2 year old.

Deb Thaxton said...

Thanks for the chuckle.


Anonymous said...

What's funny is TSR only knows to ask the question...if she had been the least bit curious as to WHY she was asking it in the first place, she would know it's not the titanium you're worried about.

Titanium is non-magnetic. Where you run into problems in the MRI (which has a really ginormous magnet in it)is that, in medicine, they like to combine surgical stainless steel with titanium to make the steel even stronger, while at the same time making it a ton lighter. You probably had that installed before surgical stainless was invented. ;)

I like to make fun of the help right in front of them, too, but it makes it more fun when they get you're making fun of them. The problem you ran into, and it seems to be startlingly common anymore, is that this newest generation is not very bright and even less inquisitive.

In fact...they remind me a lot of algae.

Gina (Mannyed) said...

a like the part where she then said, besides all the damage it could do to the equipment. Not like sparks going off in your mouth isn't a big deal.

Diane said...


(Don't you like how I've been yelling all my comments lately, just to help you out?)

g said...


Lorrie Veasey said...



Kat said...

Okay just for shits and giggles I will share my MRI story from Monday and tell you about the tumors but you will have to come visit me to find out. Muwahahaha

jill said...

men aren't allowed to have a GPS - it's too much like asking for directions. I, on the other hand, have no problem admitting that i'm lost and use it to get around LA when I need to find an alternate route on our crazy freeway system.

Laoch of Chicago said...

While the question of when titanium came to be is no doubt an interesting and important one, I feel that it pales in comparison to the idea that your head might end up sparking. UGH!

Shana said...

A sparking head wouldn't be good, that is for sure. Funny how she was more worried about the equipment

thesleepdeprivedmomma said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

This time? I Literally LOL'd! That. Is. Funny.

But NOT at your expense. That chick is really not the brightest crayon in the box, is she??

Psst! It's supposed to be 75(ish) here tomorrow ;)

Jeankfl said...

OMG.. I'm giggling too hard to type!! I love it when you snark the idiots! I'm not usually fast enough to pull it off.. And what did she think was going to happen.. fireworks?? That's not what the magnet does.. lol Although I'm sure it wouldn't be pleasant, I believe it simply makes it unreadable.. Like Kat's bra did!! I certainly could be proved wrong, cause I'm no expert, but..
I think she's been gettin both legs pulled by some techs or someone..

Queen-Size funny bone said...

thank goodness we wouldn't want her shorting out.

Noanie said...

Well now, wouldn't that be an electrifying experience if it was titanium?! Sorry, couldn't resist.

Hope your test goes well.


Soxy Deb said...

It might not spark, but after all that, mine would have blown it's top off.

Pat said...

Don't you hate the questions they ask you??? Like when I go to the dentist to have my teeth cleaned and mind you the same little gal has been doing it for 20 years, do you have a partial??? No I wouldn't have a partial of anything, its all or none for me baby!!! Glad you won't be sparking, but you do sparkle with these blogs, Have a great Christmas. Hugs, Pat