Jane is standing at the clinic desk trying to get an MRI scheduled... Merry Christmas Jane!
Twenty-Something Receptionist is studiously filling out the online form:
TSR: Do you have a pacemaker?
TSR: Any this... any that?
J: No. No.
TSR: Any chance you are pregnant?
J: *laughs* Define chance.
TSR: Do you have any metal in your head?
J: Uh, yeah.
TSR (stops typing): You do. (Not a question because I guess she gets this a lot?)
Isn't that just like Jane to make TSR's life difficult?
J: I had to have my jaw joint rebuilt a bit about 30 years ago. There's a metal thingy (medical term) in there making up part of the joint.
TSR: What's it made of?
J: Beats me. Something metalish? It shows up really well on an x-ray.
TSR (still tapping away): Well, could it possibly be titanium? Because if it is titanium, it will spark, which will not be pleasant... besides all the damage it could do to the equipment.
J (ever the comedian): It's probably not titanium. I was only about 20 when it happened. I don't think titanium had even been invented yet...
TSR (looking me over for the first time): Oh yeeahh. Duh!
And then Jane lumbered her big ole Brontasaurus body out of the office and back to the tar pits.
PS: For those of you who do realize that titanium is an element - discovered in the 1700's - rest assured that the doctor and radiologist were ultimately consulted and it was determined that Jane's head will not be sparking. This time.