he said... she said...

Saturday afternoon at Jane Central...

Jane: Something... something... mumble, mumble... living with pigs...
Homer: I don't know why you are complaining, last Saturday we did all the cleaning for you.
Jane: In... what... dream?
Homer: I can't believe you don't remember. We spent all day Saturday cleaning the house so it would be nice for your birthday.
Jane: I can't believe YOU don't remember that I spent the whole day cleaning so it would be nice for my birthday!
Homer: See, it really doesn't pay for us to help out if you don't even notice.
Jane: Girls? What did you clean last Saturday?
Alpha: Maybe my room?
Omega: Just the usual...
Homer: Well, I did a lot more than usual! I picked up all my stuff AND put away my skis.
Jane: So basically you were just a little more considerate than you typically are?
Homer: YEAH! ... I mean no... there's no right answer to that, is there?

A victory is so much more delicious when you can turn your opponent on himself.