Blaaahg!

I’m thinking about starting a new blog called ‘On the Verge of Widowhood’ or ‘ALMOST a Single Mother’. What do you think? It would probably have to be replaced eventually by ‘Jane on the Chain Gang’ or ‘Tales from the Pokey’ because that is the way my luck is rolling these days. I won’t bore you with the details right now because I am still unable to laugh about the situation and I am not in the mood to cry.

In other good news: my car is falling apart. Remember the hit she took last year from the parking lot rager? The 4-second backstory: guy in parking lot backs up to shake a finger at dude who almost hit him and succeeds at hitting me. I don’t know if that is relevant but anycrap, yesterday I noticed a rattling coming from the front passenger side of my car. After I picked up Omega, I asked her to listen as I drove through the parking lot. She rolled down the window, looked out and pointed out that what she thought should be a small crack between two car pieces, was now a gaping chasm. Translation: front bumper falling off. Upon closer examination at home, I noticed that the entire wheel well liner thingy is GONE! And the bumper is, in fact, detached. There doesn’t appear to be any damage to the bumper or any of the other remaining parts of the car. Anyone out there know how something like this happens? It is not old or rusty or American made on a Friday or Monday and I don’t believe I have run over anything. WTH?

Is it not even possible to buy corded phones anymore? I am so sick of not being able to find a phone at home. People take them, use them and then leave them to die so that the locater beeper fails to function, the phone doesn’t ring and voice mails pile up.
Some people just don’t ‘get’ the cell phone concept. If I give you my cell phone number and I say ‘that’s the best way to reach me’ I mean ‘USE THAT NUMBER, RETARD!’
Ahem, sorry. That was uncalled for.

The forecast for the next 4 days looks like a March flashback… again.

Open enrollment for health bennies ends today so I need to decide whether to stay with our current coverage or go back to the old, cheaper plan, and I need to estimate how much money to put in my Flex account. I socked away $1000 bucks last year thinking that I could surely squeeze out a pair of glasses with the leftovers… yeah, not. With two months to go, I am fundless and blind, and that means I won’t get reimbursed for all the over-the-counter meds that I have purchased in the last 10 months. Yes, I know, I should track this kind of stuff so I know for next year. If you were my real friend, you would know that on this particular paragraph here I am just looking for pity, not advice.

It is looking like another weekend where I won’t make much progress on the Patty potty project. She is gone again and the daughter’s crackhead boyfriend will be staying there to babysit the pitbulls – none of with which I want to deal. She is under the same graduation deadline that I am, and yes, I know I could just say ‘screw it’ but that’s not the way I roll. I committed to the project and I will do my best on it… IF I ever get the chance.

So… that’s most of my sad story, not including my bad hair day… and the fact that my pants, socks and shoes are 3 different colors of khaki. I know! You see how pitiful I have become?