Number 150

This is my 150th post here on Blogger. I wish Spaces kept track of that sort of thing because I am TOO lazy to go count the ones left lying in a heap over there, but it would be nice to know a grand total. In kind of the same way that you like to know your cholesterol numbers - to make sure that you aren't clogging up the internet in a deadly way.

Anydrivel, to celebrate this momentous event I won't punish you with 150 things about me. You are SO welcome!
I'm not sure there are even 150 things to be said about me. I'm not that multi-faceted.
Instead I have ripped off this little meme from some far off blog that I couldn't find again if you threatened to steal one of my kidneys or corrupt my html.
Sorry, mysterious meme donor!

My ABC's
by Jane

A - Age: Fifty. Still. Maybe forever. I have less than a week to decide. Oh, the pressure.

B - Bed size: Queen. I know it IS very fitting, but I’m not sure what that says about Homer.

C - Chore(s) you hate: Cleaning the cat box. Vacuuming the stairs. Washing windows. And dishes. I’m going to save a few megabytes and just tell you that laundry is the one chore that I don’t mind.

D - Dog’s name: If you don’t already know that, you are in worse shape than I am. Pack your bags for ‘The Home’ immediately.

E - Essential start-your-day item: Caffeine, preferably the diet Dew kind. Lent? It's still Lent?

F - Favorite color: Blue in any way shape or form.

G - Gold or Silver: Both, depends on the outfit. Platinum would be my real preference but you didn’t offer that. You must be even cheaper than I am.

H - Height: 5’10” – at least until osteoporosis ravages my body, which I’m sure is lurking right behind menopause. Middle age is SO unfair.

I - Instruments you play: I used to play the piano, the clarinet and the bassoon but I’m pretty sure I couldn’t prove it now.

J - Job title: Accountant, if the term ‘job’ implies payment. Otherwise, most of what I do could be covered by Maid, Cook and Call girl. No wait, call girls get paid, right? Marriage is unfair, too.

K - Kid(s): Three. Two that I gave birth to and one that I adopted from my mother-in-law. I have tried to send him back numerous times but the old bat is standing firm on her no-return policy.

L - Living arrangements: I have arranged to let them all live. For now.

M- Mom’s name: Ione. How’s that for odd? Bet you never had two of those in your class.

N - Nicknames: My father is the only one who has ever dared to nick my name and to tell you what it was would unleash a weapon SO annoying that Rush Limbaugh would be out of a job. On second thought….

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Is that my birth or giving birth? I’ve probably logged at least 2 weeks in the hospital but mainly because I was reckless in the time before same-day surgery and I’m not very adept at birthing.

P - Pet Peeve: When people have dirty glasses… you know with the fingerprints and eyebrow dandruff and they expect you to focus on what they’re saying when really you just want to grab those suckers and dunk them in the nearest wet substance. That’s really not the only or even worst of my pet peeves, it’s just the first one that came to mind.

Q - Quote from a movie: I’m lucky if I can remember if I have SEEN a particular movie. There is NO hope that I have retained any of the dialogue.

R- Right- or left-handed: I’m right. I'm always right. Unless you ask my husband.

S - Siblings: Two older brothers. I originally typed bothers by mistake. I think that was what you call a Freudian slip, but it would only be half true.

T - Time you wake up: At 6:05am…. And 6:12am…. And 6:19am…. And then at 6:26, which is when Homer slugs me and tells me to quit hitting the *#$@ doze!

U- Underwear: I’m a hipster girl. They don’t peek over the top of my pants or ride up my backside. MUST be cotton, preferably with a touch of lycra so they stay where I put them. Too much information, huh?

V - Vegetable you dislike: Hands down, loose peas. If you really want to see me retch, pass me the canned variety. On the other hand, I adore them raw right out of their pods.

W - Ways you run late: Many ways but most are clothing related. I am pitiful when it comes to deciding what to wear. A good day is when I don’t have to change more than 5 articles of clothing. I had a bad dream just last night about not having the right thing to wear out clubbing with some friends. We’ll skip over the fact that I don’t club and talk about how it was a particularly tricky thing to dress for because we had to crawl through tunnels and trudge through jungles to get there.

X - X-rays you’ve had: Lame. No one cares about x-rays. I'm sure it was just the only x-word they could think of. How about instead we do X-rated movie you loved? Except that they're pretty much all the same and no one remembers the titles, right? Okay, never mind X.

Y - Yummy food you make: Depends on who you ask. Homer’s a sucker for my meatloaf. The girls like my Italian fare (aka Ragu and frozen ravioli). Personally, I love the Thai stuff. I’m not that fond of cooking but it sure helps you get your way about what’s for dinner.

Z - Zoo favorite: Gotta be the monkeys. Would it not be WAY cool to be able to swing from trees and hurl shit at people all day?

Now that didn't hurt a bit, did it? If you want to do it, feel free to steal it and even change it to fit your own needs.
I may be a thief, but I am a generous theif.
With good underwear.